WHO WEARS SHORT SHORTS?

Alright.  It’s summer in some parts of the world, and with that comes an onslaught of dubious fashion decisions.  For instance, today alone I saw several people wearing rompers, which I have yet to feature on here only because I haven’t taken a sufficiently ridiculous photo.  I nearly did today of someone wearing a romper with tights.  I would like you all to take a moment to imagine how difficult her life would be in a small, cramped public restroom stall.  Due to me being a horrible person with a keen appreciation of schadenfreude, I’m actually giggling at the thought.  I also saw someone with the world’s smallest/tightest romper, and someone who had somehow managed to get the crotch of it to hang awkwardly low, making it look more like an old timey bathing costume.  But it’s the decisions to wear absolutely miniature shorts that tend to really raise my ire.

Why are they problematic?  In two words, ASS CHEEKS.

The difference between these two cracks me up. We’re an inch from having to get out the CENSORED bar on her end, and he looks like a functional human being.

That looks distinctly uncomfortable.  I’m also afraid I may know that from experience due to a pair of Band Camp Only shorts from many, many moons ago.  But there is NO WAY she can’t know that her shorts may require surgical removal from her ass.  That is the sort of thing it’s difficult to miss, both as the person walking behind her and as the girl with a wad of cotton attempting a fabric enema.

I’ve grossed myself out with that description, so I’ll save my ruminations on whether people don’t realize or don’t care for another day. See you tomorrow.

PS: I’ve decided that she probably has hilarious foot tan lines from her gladiators.  This amuses me to no end.