Jumpsuits Are High Fashion Gone Mad
November 27, 2012 4 Comments
Whenever I run out of inspiration, which is occasionally, given how frequently and at what length I am cranky about fashion, I’m reminded that all I really need do is head over to Vogue.com to see what sort of incomprehensible version of the word “best” they’re using to describe their best dressed of the week.
This week’s involves Stella McCartney, which is really all that needs said.
At least her hair looks less sad?
Nope. That doesn’t save this from being a complete sartorial tragedy.
But you know. She’s a designer, so clearly this is a Best Dressed Look.
I still hate everything about this look, from her loud print to her elastic waistband, to her unhemmed pants. I HATE when my pants are unhemmed. Right now, I am gleeful because I bought a pair of beautiful grey trousers that are just barely off the floor when I’m wearing my favorite sensible heels, and it is the most satisfying thing ever to have the perfect length pants. The knowledge of that feeling–which is mostly one of vanity and smugness, it must be said–makes me even sadder for Stella McCartney, and more concerned that she is going to trip and break her face on something.
I also hated this, but I saw it on GoFugYourself yesterday and so was not planning on writing about it, since I would be worried about subconsciously writing the same thing. But then I saw it on Vogue’s best dressed, and we must take a moment to appreciate that even Diane Kruger, who can wear the hell out of anything, looks dumb in a jumpsuit.
The length is awkward, the fit is awkward, and I’ll bet that as with all jumpsuits, this is unflattering on her butt. That is the problem with jumpsuits: No one looks good in them, and they are a joke that the fashion industry is playing on us. I am not having it, even if this is currently the winning look on Vogue.com.