Awkward Tights And Uggs

April 1, 2013 3 Comments

Awkward patterned tights–or pantyhose–with Uggs are awful in every way.

I’m anti-patterned pants, tights, leggings, or pantyhose anyway, since I tend to be anti print anyway when it comes to pants. It’s too busy visually, and depending on the cut, can make the wearer look shorter and/or wider. At the very least, it draws a weird attention to the wearer’s legs. Printed pantyhose that are otherwise sheer just give a look of uncomfortable skin diseases, something no one should ever, ever aspire to in their sartorial choices.

You should also never, ever pair a going out outfit, even one with a denim skirt and printed tights, with Ugg boots.

Read more of this post

Filed under Terrible Tagged with , , , , ,

It May Seem Innocuous, But….

March 25, 2013 3 Comments

This is very nearly a stereotypical flasher look, but with pantyhose instead of Creepy Guy On The Subway or Street Corner. It is also baffling, given the apparently frigid weather conditions. I am reliably informed that there was two feet of snow on the ground, which is already not the time to go out wearing pantyhose unless you absolutely have to. Even so, I will go for a thick pair of tights and boots if I have to wear a dress when it’s snowing and minus 1000 out.

Although it must be said, usually when it’s minus 1000 and snowing, I usually prefer to stay inside being as spectacularly frumpy as possible and not outside flashing innocent bakery goers with my questionably shod boyfriend.

Read more of this post

Filed under Terrible Tagged with , , , , , , , , ,

St. Patrick’s Day Is No Excuse

March 18, 2013 4 Comments

That is the exact subject line of  the email I got. And never has it been so true. Last year’s unfortunate green tuxedo shirt is nothing to this hot mess.

There is so much wrong with St. Patrick’s Day fashion choices to begin with, since people (at least in America) tend to take the idea of “wear something green” and run with it, wearing increasingly unflattering and weird t-shirts and outfits while wearing green everything and generally smelling of beer and whisky, as though that is what being Irish is. But there is no excuse for dressing this badly short of an ironic Halloween.

Anyway, here is some green-tinged delusion.

Read more of this post

Filed under Holiday Special!, Terrible Tagged with , , , , , , , , , , ,

Misguided Hipster With Bonus Tights As Pants

March 13, 2013 9 Comments

In further proof that far too many people wear tights as pants and it is ALWAYS a terrible thing, I present a misguided hipster, combining as many hipster stereotypes at once as I can think of, with bonus tights as pants. It’s a panoply of hipster mess-making.

My biggest problem here (besides the see-through tights, which is problem enough, really) lies in the complete disconnect between hipster top and see-through bottom. It makes absolutely no sense whatsoever, like a banana tree on a wedding registry.

Read more of this post

Filed under Terrible Tagged with , , , , , , , , ,

Terrible Tights In Twos

March 12, 2013 6 Comments

Sometimes I can’t resist the alliterative title. Today is one of those days, but this is another glowing example of bad things coming in twos.

There is a very long list of things I can’t stand about or regarding tights (or leggings) as pants, starting with “it’s a thing”. But I doubly hate any pair of tights or leggings as pants that involve any weird fading, ombre effects, unnecessary prints, inexplicable socks, or neon colors.  Or really anything, since I hate tights/leggings as pants. Because they aren’t pants.

Read more of this post

Filed under Terrible Tagged with , , , , , , ,

← Older posts

Follow

Get every new post delivered to your Inbox.

Join 500 other followers